1. Host a Sleepover/Party:

You can never go wrong with having a sleepover or party. You could even mix them and have a party, and then people can spend the night. The party could include games, you could make dinner or order pizza, do nails. There are so many fun options of what to do, whether it’s activities or whether it’s food on Pinterest. Of course a movie is always a great idea too. You could watch a cheesy rom-com to celebrate the day. Some great classics include “10 Things I hate about you”, and “13 Going on 30”.  

2. Charcuterie Board Night:

If you haven’t seen this trend on TikTok, you should look it up. It is such a unique spin on having people bring their own food for a get together or a party! Everyone can bring their own charcuterie board with different foods on it. This can be anything from a chicken nugget board, candy board, to a pizza board. And the great thing about it is, you can put as little or as much effort into it as you want.

3. Make a “Date” Night:

This might work better if it is just you and one friend, however you could really do this with as many people as you want, it just might get a bit tricky. But basically the idea is that you plan a date night and ask the other person (or people) on a date with you. It is a fun way to make someone feel special on Valentine’s Day, and you can go as simple or full out with this as you want to. You could have a picnic, go out to a fancy restaurant, go get dessert, etc.. Whatever is something that you and the other person will enjoy. It doesn’t even have to be surrounded by food; this can be a movie night or something like bowling even.

4. Tea Party:

This might sound abnormal and weird even, but this could be something nice and different than what you would normally do with your friends. You could set a theme such as Alice in Wonderland, all dress up, and make food surrounding the theme. This also provides a great opportunity for pictures, which is always a nice bonus. And the good thing about this option is you can do this wherever, and you can find lots of inspiration on Pinterest for hosting a tea party.

5. Plan a Photoshoot:

Who doesn’t love an excuse to get dressed up and take pictures with your besties? Put on some cute outfits, try a new hairstyle, do a sparkly makeup look. There are endless ideas for backdrops, poses, outfits, etc. online. Pick some that you like and have a fun time. You could put on some music and get some props, and just make it into a whole event. Bonus points if you also make some TikToks!

For more ways to celebrate Galentine’s Day, click here!

And check out this fun Girl Spring Quiz: Plan a Galentine’s Day Celebration and We’ll Tell You What Type of Friend You Are!

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Modern relationships exist under pressures that previous generations rarely faced. Work demands extend beyond office hours. Digital communication blurs boundaries. Social expectations around success, parenting, and emotional availability continue to rise. Within this environment, maintaining connection requires more than shared history. It requires conscious effort and emotional awareness.

Recognizing a plateau is often the first step toward growth rather than an endpoint.

Understanding Emotional Drift in Long-Term Partnerships

Emotional drift happens quietly. It rarely arrives with a single conflict or dramatic event. Instead, it develops through accumulated stress, unspoken needs, and delayed conversations. Partners may still care deeply for one another while feeling increasingly disconnected.

Common contributors to emotional drift include unresolved disagreements, mismatched communication styles, exhaustion from caregiving or work responsibilities, and avoidance of vulnerable conversations. Over time, couples may default to efficiency rather than emotional presence. Tasks get done, schedules managed, but emotional intimacy receives less attention.

Awareness matters because drift does not reverse itself automatically. When couples acknowledge the pattern without assigning blame, they create space for repair rather than resentment.

Communication Beyond Problem Solving

Many couples communicate frequently yet still feel misunderstood. This happens when communication focuses only on logistics or conflict resolution. Emotional connection grows through curiosity, empathy, and reflective listening rather than efficiency alone.

Healthy communication allows room for nuance. It includes asking how a partner feels rather than assuming. It involves listening without preparing a rebuttal. It also means expressing needs without defensiveness or accusation.

When communication shifts from problem-solving to understanding, partners feel safer sharing fears, hopes, and uncertainty. This safety strengthens emotional intimacy even during challenging periods.

Reframing Conflict as Information

Many people see conflict as something to avoid or eliminate. In reality, it provides insight into unmet needs, emotional boundaries, and personal values. When couples learn to view conflict as information rather than a threat, it becomes a tool for growth.

Disagreements reveal where partners experience stress, vulnerability, or frustration. Addressing these signals constructively helps couples move forward with greater clarity. This approach requires slowing down reactions and focusing on the underlying emotion rather than the surface argument.

Conflict handled with care often deepens trust because it demonstrates commitment to understanding rather than winning.

Emotional Maintenance Is Ongoing Work

Relationships thrive when emotional care becomes routine rather than reactive. Waiting until tension escalates often makes repair harder. Emotional maintenance involves regular check-ins, shared reflection, and mutual accountability.

Some couples build this practice through intentional conversations, shared rituals, or guided support. Others recognize that external guidance helps them navigate deeper patterns. Engaging in couples therapy can provide a structured space for examining communication habits, emotional needs, and relationship dynamics with professional support.

This form of care isn’t just for a crisis. Many couples use therapy proactively to strengthen their connection, build resilience, and deepen their understanding during transitional life phases.

How Individual Growth Impacts Partnership Health

Each partner continues to grow individually within a relationship. Personal stress, mental health challenges, career changes, and evolving identities influence how people show up emotionally. When individual growth feels unsupported or misunderstood, disconnection often follows.

Healthy relationships make room for personal development without perceiving it as distance. Partners who support one another’s growth foster trust and mutual respect. This requires flexibility, patience, and ongoing dialogue about changing needs.

When individuals feel emotionally supported, they are more capable of contributing positively to the relationship as a whole.

Rebuilding Intimacy Through Shared Presence

Intimacy extends beyond physical closeness. Emotional intimacy grows through shared presence and attunement. This includes undistracted time together, meaningful conversation, and emotional responsiveness.

Simple changes often restore connection. Putting devices away during meals, scheduling intentional time together, or revisiting shared interests can create space for reconnection. These actions signal care and priority even amid busy schedules.

Consistency matters more than grand gestures. Regular moments of presence build trust and emotional safety over time.

When Support Becomes a Strength

Seeking relationship support reflects investment rather than weakness. As conversations around mental health become more normalized, couples increasingly view support as a tool for growth rather than a last resort.

Professional counseling environments offer neutrality, structure, and perspective. They help couples identify patterns that may feel invisible from within the relationship. With guidance, partners learn practical strategies for communication, emotional regulation, and conflict navigation.

Support empowers couples to move forward with intention rather than remaining stuck in cycles of misunderstanding.

Signs a Relationship Is Ready for Deeper Work

Some couples sense readiness for growth without experiencing overt conflict. Others notice recurring patterns that feel unresolved. Common signs include emotional distance, repetitive arguments, difficulty expressing needs, or feeling unheard despite frequent communication.

These signals do not indicate failure. They suggest the relationship is asking for attention and care. Addressing them early often prevents deeper disconnection later.

Relationships evolve alongside the people within them. Recognizing when to pause, reflect, and seek clarity supports long-term emotional health.

Building Sustainable Connection Over Time

Sustainable relationships rely on adaptability rather than perfection. They allow room for mistakes, repair, and learning. Emotional connection strengthens when partners commit to curiosity, compassion, and accountability.

Growth-oriented relationships recognize that challenges are inevitable. What matters is how partners respond to those challenges together. With intentional communication, emotional awareness, and supportive resources, couples can rebuild connection even after periods of distance.

A relationship that grows through reflection and care becomes more resilient, authentic, and fulfilling over time.

The post When Relationships Hit Plateaus: Rebuilding Connection With Intention appeared first on GirlSpring.

Living Happily Ever After!

Sometimes, your personal love story can indeed feel like something straight out of a rom-com, and you don’t even know it! That special boy or girl just won’t get out of your head, and you’re always dreaming about how your big day will go. Sending invitations, looking at wedding venues, and saying “I do” to a breathtaking backdrop is the focus of all your future thoughts! Of course, every great rom-com has an unforgettable swooning moment, so go get yours!

Daydreaming About Someone Special

As they say, there’s something about the boy (or girl), and it can be hard to forget about them when you feel like you’re in love. You are in that special kind of relationship when you find yourself thinking about them constantly when you should be getting on with something else. Like a splinter in your brain, there they are, but in a good way! Daydreams about your special someone can also become a fairytale romance as you fantasize about your future together.

A Rom-Com Relationship is Highly Emotional

Teens and young adults get into relationships and feel intense attraction, and this is normal. Unfortunately, the average teen relationship only lasts around 11 months on average, but it is worth the wait to find that special someone. But for that short time, the feelings of attraction and love can be extremely intense; with so many ups and downs, it’s what we call an emotional rollercoaster, and for good reason! Emotional management will make things much easier.

Overt Displays of Affection

So, you’re probably making out all the time, and you can’t keep your hands off each other! But as you are well aware, there is a time and a place! Unlike your favorite rom-com, people in the real world don’t want to see that! Private moments are, well, private! Public displays aren’t to be discouraged, though. Public affection can be a little more PG, and there is nothing wrong with romantic dates, holding hands and hugging are just as intimate without grossing people out.

The Green-Eyed Monster on Your Back

There’s no emotion quite like jealousy. You know you’re in something like a rom-com relationship when the thought of your partner with someone else infuriates you. Jealousy is normal, and everyone feels it now and then. But it can be intense when it comes to love and can lead to possessiveness and immense insecurity. So be aware that when this happens, the love part will begin to crumble. Talk to someone about these feelings if they are haunting you.

Summary

Thinking about marriage and the future is a strong sign you are in something like a rom-com relationship. You will also experience the highs and lows or raw emotions. This includes jealousy, so be aware that this can be very negative and lead to issues such as possessiveness.

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Why Volunteering Matters

Volunteering offers a way to give back while gaining personal growth. Communities rely on people who are willing to share their time and skills.

Personal Benefits

Helping others also helps volunteers develop confidence, new skills, and valuable experiences that improve future opportunities.

Community Impact

Through service, volunteers support local nonprofits, strengthen community ties, and provide resources for those in need.

A Path to a Better Society

Ultimately, volunteering creates a culture of empathy, compassion, and collective responsibility.

Resources

https://www.helpguide.org/mental-health/wellbeing/volunteering-and-its-surprising-benefits

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By Victoria Spear

“Spirited Away” is not only celebrated as a classic and beautiful Japanese animated film but also for its profound lessons and meanings. From the cleansing of a polluted river spirit to the transformation of greedy parents into pigs, the film is rich with symbolism. At its core, the story follows Chihiro’s journey of growth and self-discovery. Throughout Hayao Miyazaki’s “Spirited Away,” Chihiro’s experiences illustrate her growth and transition through adolescence, leading to a more mature state of mind when she returns to her world. Through its symbols, character interactions, and challenges, the film portrays Chihiro’s coming-of-age journey. 

One thing studio Ghibli films the visuals and symbols, as the facial expressions within characters can capture moments that convey meaning without having to say them explicitly. Arguably, one of the scenes in particular that comes is in regards to the red tunnel that the family goes into at the beginning of the film. The red tunnel can be symbolized as a transition through puberty and new beginnings. In the beginning, we can see Chihiros growing anxiety with having to move to a new area, not only that but a new school as well. She’s afraid of this new beginning and thus clings to her parents as much as possible for guidance. 

Once Chihiro and her parents pass through the tunnel, there is a noticeable shift in their roles. Chihiro, who starts as a scared and uncertain child, becomes the voice of reason, warning her parents not to eat the food that doesn’t belong to them. Her refusal to indulge in the food symbolizes her rejection of greed and immaturity, distinguishing her from her parents, who succumb to their appetites and are transformed into pigs. This transformation represents the consequences of gluttony and selfishness, while Chihiro’s restraint marks the beginning of her journey towards maturity.

The bathhouse in “Spirited Away” also  serves as a crucial setting for Chihiro’s transformation and growth. Upon entering the bathhouse, Chihiro is initially overwhelmed by its unfamiliarity and the various spirits she encounters. However, as she begins working there, she undergoes a process of purification and renewal. The bathhouse itself is a place where spirits come to cleanse themselves, and this symbolism extends to Chihiro’s journey. One pivotal moment to highlight  is Chihiro’s encounter with the polluted river spirit. Initially mistaken for a “stink spirit,” the river spirit is covered in filth and pollution. Chihiro bravely takes on the task of cleaning it, and in doing so, she not only reveals the true nature of the spirit but also undergoes a symbolic cleansing herself. As she pulls out the debris and pollution, the river spirit emerges clean and renewed, and in gratitude, it holds her up and envelops her in warm water. This act can be seen as a baptism of sorts, symbolizing Chihiro’s own purification and rebirth.

The river spirit’s cleansing parallels Chihiro’s internal transformation. By helping the spirit, Chihiro sheds her own fears and insecurities, embracing a sense of responsibility and compassion. The warm water that envelops her represents a safe and nurturing space, allowing her to emerge stronger and more confident. This moment signifies a new beginning for Chihiro, as she starts to fully rid herself of past mistakes and childish fears. Throughout her time in the bathhouse, Chihiro faces numerous challenges that test her courage and resilience. She learns to navigate the complex social dynamics of the spirit world, makes alliances with characters like Haku and Lin, and overcomes obstacles with determination and empathy. Her interactions with figures such as Yubaba and No-Face further highlight her growing maturity. Despite the dangers and uncertainties she faces, Chihiro consistently shows compassion and a willingness to help others, even when it puts her at risk.

By the end of the film, Chihiro’s transformation is complete. As she and her parents return through the tunnel, Chihiro no longer looks back with uncertainty. Her experiences in the spirit world have instilled in her a newfound confidence and self-assurance. Haku’s parting words and the knowledge that she has saved her parents and herself reinforce her growth. She emerges from the tunnel not as the scared girl who entered, but as a more mature and self-assured individual, ready to face the challenges of her own world. The tunnel is no longer read either, its covered with new flora and fauna showing that each leaf and vine was formed through each decision and action she made. This transition is a powerful symbol of her coming of age, illustrating the film’s overarching theme of growth and the journey from childhood to maturity.

Another significant influence on Chihiro’s growth is her interactions with other characters, particularly her bond with Haku. When Chihiro first encounters Haku, he immediately provides comfort and guidance in her frightening situation. Haku directs her to Kamaji, who acts as a father figure to the other two young workers, and ensures that she is well taken care of within the bathhouse. He arranges for her to get a job, allowing her to stay and form a plan to rescue herself and her parents.Throughout the film, Chihiro often turns to Haku for support. One notable instance is when he takes her to the stalls where her parents, now transformed into pigs, are being held. Overwhelmed by her circumstances, Chihiro breaks down, but Haku offers her food and reassures her with a gentle promise to help. This supportive relationship contrasts sharply with the negligence her parents showed at the beginning of the film, highlighting the positive impact of a healthy support system on her growth.

Haku’s influence on Chihiro becomes evident in her actions later in the film. When Haku falls into trouble with Yubaba, the main antagonist representing the challenges Chihiro must overcome, Chihiro steps in to save him. Haku is punished by Yubaba’s twin sister, Zeniba, for stealing from her, and Chihiro’s loyalty to him drives her to take action. Her willingness to embark on a dangerous journey to Zeniba’s cottage demonstrates her courage and the deep friendship between her and Haku.

Chihiro’s relationship with Haku helps her gain confidence and develop a sense of responsibility. She transitions from a fearful girl into someone who is willing to face any challenge to help her friends and family. Her determination to save Haku, despite the risks involved, shows how much she has grown. This transformation is further highlighted when she helps Haku remember his true identity as a river spirit, revealing that he saved her from drowning in his river before it was paved over. Chihiro’s bond with Haku has significantly influenced her character. She has learned to make decisions with confidence and resolve, facing her problems head-on. Haku’s steadfast support and the loyalty they share have been crucial in Chihiro’s journey from fear and uncertainty to maturity and self-assurance. This growth is a testament to the power of strong, supportive relationships in overcoming adversity and finding one’s true self.

In retrospect, Haku isn’t the only one aiding Chihiro’s growth; No-Face also plays a significant role. Initially, No-Face’s character is difficult to understand, shrouded in mystery. The spirit’s close connection with Chihiro throughout the film can be interpreted in various ways. One theory is that No-Face acts as a mirror to Chihiro’s former self. The spirit’s interactions with Chihiro on a desperate level reflect how she tried to connect with her parents. As a child relies on their parents for nearly everything and seeks their attention, Chihiro’s initial behavior mirrors this dependence. Similarly, No-Face exhibits childlike tendencies, lashing out when things don’t go his way. Chihiro’s interactions with No-Face demonstrate her growth as she nurtures the spirit. She invites him into the bathhouse, thanks him for his kindness, and gently rejects his unwanted offerings. This mirrors a parental role, balancing gentleness with firm decisions for the best outcome.

The conflict between Chihiro and No-Face further highlights her development. When Chihiro gives No-Face medicine to purge the ‘evil’ from his body, he lashes out in pain, not understanding that it’s for his own good. It reminds you of a child, lashing out in confusion and fear, The girl doesn’t grow angry with him either; she simply runs away until the male calms down. Chihiro’s insistence on helping No-Face despite his reaction shows her growing maturity and compassion. She even takes No-Face with her to visit Zeniba, recognizing that the bathhouse environment is not beneficial for him, saying it wasn’t “good for him.” This dynamic illustrates Chihiro’s evolving character. She learns to care for others, understand their needs, and make decisions for their well-being. By nurturing No-Face, Chihiro displays a level of empathy and responsibility that marks her transformation from a dependent child to a caring and mature or even maternal individual. This relationship, alongside her bond with Haku, underscores her journey towards self-discovery and growth throughout the film.

In conclusion, Spirited Away masterfully portrays Chihiro’s growth through various elements, from the symbolism of cleansing to her personal transformation and the meaningful relationships she forms along the way. The film encapsulates the essence of adolescence as a journey filled with adventure and self-discovery. Chihiro’s experiences illustrate the transition from childhood to maturity, showing her ability to stand on her own. This film resonates with many because it is both comforting and motivating, offering profound lessons about growth through the eyes of a ten-year-old navigating a new world. In the process, she not only transforms herself for the better but also positively impacts those around her. The beautifully crafted narrative and rich symbolism Hayao Miyazaki conveys through “Spirited Away” connected a timeless exploration of the challenges and triumphs of growing up.

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I know it’s past Valentine’s Day, but love lasts all year.

I’ve always knew that the swan boats in the Boston Public Garden were perfect for a romantic scene, but they also have connections to some of my favorite childhood love stories.

In the Trumpet of the Swan, trumpeter swan Louis is mute, meaning he can’t mate with other swans. He steals a trumpet and becomes a famous musician so he can find his voice and confess his love to his crush Serena. He plays on the swan boats to repay his trumpet. After travelling to Philadelphia and rescuing Serena from the zoo, he serenades her with the trumpet and wins her over. Now that’s W rizz!

You might not associate Make Way for Ducklings with love, but a story of familial love and sacrifice is just as beautiful. Finding the perfect home is an exciting and nerve-wracking experience for many couples. Mrs. Mallard takes her ducklings on a journey through dangerous Boston streets (I can confirm, the traffic is crazy!) to their forever home in the Public Garden. They lived happily ever after- if you visit today, there is a statue dedicated to the Mallard family and so many ducks in the pond! 

In real life, love is more complicated than our daydreams and cute lovebird stories. We fantasize about perfect moments and finally being accepted by the one! But it’s the struggle that makes love worth it. The uncertainty, the sacrifices, the heartbreak. And I think it is better to face rejection than not having tried at all. 

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Getting into a relationship for the first time can be one of the most thrilling experiences in your life. But, of course, there are risks. You don’t always know your romantic partner as well as you would like to think. 

So, what can you do to protect yourself? How can you have a great relationship and ensure you aren’t going to get hurt in the process? 

Communicate Effectively

If you have a romantic partner, focus on communicating effectively. Be clear about what you want and expect from the relationship. This step isn’t about writing a shopping list; it’s about setting boundaries and ensuring you get the respect you deserve. 

Effective communication requires a level of assertiveness. You want to go into interactions, willing and able to put your needs first, especially when it comes to matters involving aggressive behavior. 

It’s okay to be open with your partner in a relationship, but it is a good idea to build up a reasonable level of trust before you do that. You want to know more about them before you rush into something. 

Wait And Observe

It’s also a good idea to wait and observe when it comes to romantic relationships. While getting swept off your feet is tempting, it can also land you in hot water if you don’t exercise caution. 

It’s a good idea to read up on sexual assault awareness programs if they are available to you. These provide more information on the kind of behaviors that are okay, and also when things cross the line. 

Sometimes, it pays to sit back and pay attention to how your partner treats you alone and around other people. The more you can see of them, the more you can learn about their character and how things are likely to work out for you in the future. 

If you feel like asking questions, do so. Probing them can help you find out if you have any shared values. If you don’t that’s also okay, but it could mean that your relationship is harder in the future. 

Keep Learning

Another thing that helps is educating yourself about healthy relationships and what they look like. It can take time to learn this, so it is okay if you don’t understand everything immediately. 

Sometimes, reading books on the subject is useful because you can learn lines or phrases you can deploy in difficult situations. It’s often possible to have disagreements with your partner without them blowing up into tensions. 

Throughout it all, you want to remain yourself. The personality you have isn’t something you should have to give up, just to be with someone else. 

Protect Your Emotional Energy

Lastly, you need to protect your emotional energy sometimes. Many relationships are draining and don’t enrich your life. When this happens, you might want to take a closer look at whether the relationship is right for you. Sometimes, it’s not. 

Be careful of people who try to sweep you up in grand gestures. Often, these individuals don’t have your best interests at heart.

The post Protecting Yourself In Relationships: How To Stay One Step Ahead appeared first on GirlSpring.

Many questions randomly seem to pass through my mind throughout what my biological clock tells me is “day”. Yet, one seems to appear multiple times a day. A version of the question “What is Love?”

Safety, Warmth, Shelter, and Compassion. The feeling of belonging and knowing you are right where you need to be. Not the type of love where requests are met due to obligation or requirement, but the reciprocated type of love. The effortless flow of feeling and simple want of being in the presence of certain people type of love. Not the type that makes you feel like you have to change yourself to be just right, or the type of love that is forced upon you through relation. Simply the indescribable emotion felt only with certain people who motivate you to be better. Without you even knowing it, these people genuinely want the best for you. The type of love where you won’t understand its significance until you have felt it purely.

However, as this question persisted in my mind, I realized that there can’t be one concrete answer to it. Just as an essay or analysis can vary depending on the author, the answer genuinely differs from person to person. A reflective example: Imagine someone who misses their loved one. They make connections throughout the day that resemble that person’s influence on their own life.

For instance, two trees-one shorter than the other-remind a person of someone they miss. The same applies to the people’s relationship. In this example, those who have not shared the same experiences and moments with this person will likely see the trees as random, highlighting why the definition of love depends on your individual experiences. Without the experiences that each person feels individually, the power of Love diminishes with false hope.

Despite the feeling of pure happiness brought by being around loved ones, love can teach us many things as well. The vulnerability felt automatically when expressing love towards people brings joy and growth into our lives. Although love may bring everyone a peculiar connection with trees, it sure can make us do things we didn’t think we would do for anyone.

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Understanding their feelings without imposing solutions

When a friend confides in us during their low moments, listening attentively and validating their feelings is crucial. The temptation to immediately offer solutions can be strong, but it’s important to resist. Instead, providing a compassionate ear without rushing to fix their problems shows respect for their ability to navigate their emotions. By asking open-ended questions and reflecting on what we’ve heard, we help our friends feel understood and supported, strengthening the bond of friendship and trust. This approach fosters a deeper connection and empowers them to find their path forward.

Creating a safe space for open communication

To uplift a friend who is feeling downhearted, fostering an environment where they can speak freely and without judgment is paramount. This means actively showing empathy and keeping an open mind to their perspective. Let them know it’s okay to express their feelings, whether sadness, frustration, or anger. Remind them that you’re there to listen and support, not to critique or judge. A safe space for communication is built on trust and reassurance, allowing your friend to open up on their terms and timeline, making them feel truly heard and seen.

Small gestures make a big difference

Never underestimate a small gesture’s impact in lifting a friend’s spirits. A heartfelt note, a comforting embrace, or spending quality time together can speak volumes to a downhearted friend. For those special moments when you want to offer something tangible, consider the warmth that sympathy gifts can bring. A carefully chosen token of empathy can provide solace and a physical reminder of your support during their time of need. Similarly, if your friend finds strength and solace in their faith, religious gifts from The Basketry can be a meaningful way to show your care and respect for their spiritual journey.

These gifts, whether symbols of faith or tokens of sympathy are more than just items; they are a testament to your thoughtful consideration and deep connection. These small acts of kindness and understanding, tailored to your friend’s needs and personality, can significantly brighten their darker days. Remember, it’s not the grandeur of the gesture that counts, but the love and intention behind it.

Encouraging professional help when necessary

Sometimes, despite our best efforts, a friend may need more support than we can provide. Recognizing when professional help is necessary and encouraging your friend to seek it is essential. Approach the topic with sensitivity and care, ensuring your friend understands that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Offer to assist them in finding a therapist or support group and, if they’re open to it, accompany them to their first appointment. It’s a delicate balance of respecting their autonomy while gently nudging them towards resources that can provide the specialized assistance they may need.

Staying consistent and patient

Supporting a friend through their low moments requires patience and a consistent presence. It’s essential to understand that healing and emotional recovery take time. Even when there are no new developments or improvements, showing up for your friend sends a powerful message of unwavering support. Consistency in your care and concern can provide a comforting sense of stability for someone navigating the ups and downs of their emotions. This could mean regular check-ins, whether through messages, calls, or in-person visits, depending on what your friend is comfortable with.

It’s also important to be patient with their progress, avoiding any pressure for them to “get better” quickly. Acknowledge and accept their feelings and state of mind, knowing that emotional landscapes are complex and change can be gradual. Your patience and steady support can make a profound difference, offering a beacon of hope and companionship throughout their journey to brighter days.

Celebrating small victories together

Recognizing and celebrating the small victories can be incredibly uplifting for a friend who’s been feeling downhearted. Whether it’s a day they managed to get out of bed when it felt impossible or a task they completed that they’ve been putting off, acknowledging these steps forward can boost their morale. It’s a way of reinforcing progress, no matter how minor it may seem. Sharing in the joy of these achievements fosters a positive atmosphere and reminds your friend that their efforts are seen and appreciated. This can inspire continued progress and contribute to a more optimistic outlook.

Remember, through these actions, we help our friends navigate their low moments and strengthen the bonds of friendship, ensuring they know they’re not alone.

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In the books I read, and in posters tacked on school hallways, it was the pain of losing a romantic partner that they warned us about. School counselors brought in classrooms to caution us about not losing ourselves in the wake of a breakup, how you, as a person are so much stronger and can be defined as more than just a girlfriend. How it is important to have a support system. What happens when your support system breaks?

Our bonds of friendship, I thought, were strong. They would not break, crack, or falter. We had seen each other through tears and pain, anger and joy. I noticed my friends growing distant from me, not responding to my texts, my smile. Sharing inside jokes but leaving me on the outside. I brushed it off. I was warned, my friends would leave me. That too, I brushed away. What did they know, I thought. I observed my friends as they would leave me behind as I ran behind them. But this distance, it was just a passing thing. We had so many memories together, we had stuck with each other. They wouldn’t, couldn’t leave me behind.

When the blow came, when I was left shattered on the ground, confused and hurt by those I had trusted, I was oblivious. I did not know what I had done, did not know that sometimes, you don’t need to have done anything. Sometimes people can cut you down and move along like it was nothing because for them, it was.

When all the books I had read and all the warnings I had received had focused only on romantic relationships, I was blindsided by my friendship breakup. How could I continue, how could I make new friends if the ones I had, the ones I trusted and loved had looked at me and deemed me unworthy? No one had told me how painful it was to have been stabbed in the back by the ones you’d trusted above all.

Some nights, I would cry. Safely under the covers of my bed, looking back upon our good memories. Most nights though, I was angry. I imagined storming up to them and demanding answers. Though I saw them every day in classes, I never spoke to them, nor them me. I learned to move on, to look at our friendship with not tears, but a bittersweet smile. I cherished my new friends, but I did not forget my old ones. Still, I remember, and still, I am sad. But now, I can also be glad that we had the time together that we had. Now, I can be happy that I am making new memories and living without them. Now I can say that I am better off without them, and I am a different person than who I was then, and I like myself better now.

Now, I know who I am.

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